so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
