I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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