I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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