And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
40s are totally the cure
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
