there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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