Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
