She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
