What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
