# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
