She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
