Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Randomize
