Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
