We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize