Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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