...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize