so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Randomize
