We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Why did my mother make you get naked?
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
