Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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