yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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