I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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