You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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