Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
