Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
