3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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