i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Randomize
