forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize