Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
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I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I have feelings that need drinking.
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You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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