id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
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