We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
