We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
