There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
