chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I love you. Go after that dick
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