i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
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