I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize
