Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
