Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Fuck appropriateness.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize