ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire