My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
