can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
