You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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