I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
