Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
only you would photoshop your dick
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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