No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
