I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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