walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
