Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
