from now on my penis is your penis
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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