i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize