Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
