I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
