I didn't shave. On purpose
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
