I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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